An utter loss of control

The things I feared about leaving the country for an extended amount of time have come to fruition. It is not homesickness in it's usual form. It is more a desire to be back home so I can be there to take care of the things I am passionate about. Right now my beloved friends in Bridge Builders are struggling yet again with Belmont's willingness to accept them as they (we) are. And while I desperately wish I was there with them I am not. It's almost a feeling of abandonment on my part, and I know they don't feel that way but it's still a feeling I'm having to cope with.